He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
