Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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