I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
