There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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