I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
