How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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