I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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