I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
