I will die if light touches me.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
