why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize