Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
