Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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