it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
