just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
