I met the friendliest cop last night
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
