Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
