So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
