whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
and you fell through a lawn chair
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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