You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
