Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
