Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
