I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
