in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
