Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Girls should come with a carfax report
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
