Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
