the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I think your dad took our porno
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
