is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
