she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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