I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
