Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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