if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I have already put on my inside pants.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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