this boner is exhausting
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
