Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
and she was petting her beer can
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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