Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
