i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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