I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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