What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
Randomize
