Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
