where does the pee come out of this thing
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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