youre lurking in front of me
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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