Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
