so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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