I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
