i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
