Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
