It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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