I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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