I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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