she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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