There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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